Don't Fear Confrontation - Embrace It | #Intangibl3
- JP | #Intangibl3
- Jun 18, 2017
- 4 min read
I've been noticing lately that there are so many men that are just timid. Under the slightest bit of applied pressure they cave in. It worries me when I find men that are in positions of authority that can't or won't take their place seriously and stand their ground against their subordinates. Not only that, but when you have a job that involves directing other people, regardless of their station, one shouldn't allow control to slip away.
When I say something I expect my words to be heard and heeded. If they are not then I don't cower back and allow someone else to control the situation - I take control and stand my ground. I force the other person/people to exert much more force than they are generally comfortable with if they want to see things work out their way.
I'm using a workplace example because that is where I most often interact with many different men, but it applies there and everywhere in life. I used to be sort of timid - well more so than I am now at least - but I learned a long time ago that while I don't relish controlling other people (leading and controlling are two different things) I absolutely abhor being controlled. It's just part of who I am, I suppose.
When I was in school they labeled it "problems with authority," while I called it not being a fucking pushover. I guess I've never really been one to take shit so I, in part, assumed that most other men were that way too.
I was wrong.
Real masculinity in the West is in danger and this is clear evidence of that. The pliability of the average modern man astounds me. I understand that flexibility is not in itself a negative thing, and in fact is sometimes conducive or even necessary to reach some semblance of resolution, but it's been taken to extremes.
Men are afraid even to give the impression that they are aggressive. The vibe that I give off naturally seems to magnetically pull some closer and in just the same way pushes others away. I can see it in their eyes. While other men fear giving off the "wrong" impression - I make that impression work for me. Why try to be someone I'm not? I'm not a "people-pleaser" and to try to be one would be fake. The truth is that I simply don't give much of a shit about what these people think of me and that indubitable quality of authenticity has served me well.
So, why do these men speak softly and carry a small stick? Well I suppose that it could be any number of reasons including but not limited to:
1. Lack of confidence
2. Fear of confrontation
3. Low Testosterone
{ Numbers 1 and 2, as well as a plethora of other things, could be a direct result of number 3. I think that as lazy and overweight as the West is, particularly the United States, it's become acceptable to be that way among the majority. Now you'll get shouted down for "fat-shaming" if you call out another person's unhealthy habits. Feelings have become more important than reality and as such more and more men find it easier to go to work (if they do that much), come home, drink and eat shit and play video games or watch television for hours. Men are "allowed" to be this way. Some women may complain about it but I think that is more of a "keeping up appearances" sort of thing; after all, men becoming more complacent like this allows for a female led home.}
Anyway, it's no wonder why men are weak. We're nearly encouraged to be that way. Frankly, though, it sickens me. I cringe every time I see a man ask for permission to do what he is supposed to be doing anyway; I despise it when men aren't in control of their shit. I'm 100% not perfect - I'm still on my journey - but I hate it when I see men not even fucking trying. At least put in some effort!
Sometimes you have to dig in your heels and refuse to move. In non-emergency situations my default is to question before moving but should I choose to move, those around me know for sure that I didn't move out of fear but because there was a good reason.
Whether or not you standing your ground leads to a violent reaction on the part of the opposing force - just fucking do it. It hurts a lot more to live knowing that you were too weak to stand up for yourself than it does to get hit.
Don't fear confrontation - embrace it.
Until next time,
JP
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